kismet \ KIZ-met; -mit \ , noun; 1. Destiny; fate.

Applewhite's writings are heavy with kismet : he said he was visiting a hospitalized friend when Mrs. Nettles entered the room and their eyes locked in a shared recognition of esoteric secrets.

-- Barry Bearak, "Eyes on Glory: Pied Pipers of Heaven's Gate", New York Times , April 28, 1997

 

Kismet has such a lovely ring to it. I love the way it skips off your tongue. The sound of the word makes you feel as though fate and destiny are such happy little creatures. So let's think about this, what would life be like if everything was kismet?

  

Lets go back into the past, waaaay back to the year... 1999. ooooooooo! duhnuh! (Sound effects, make of them what you will) 

Two young girls are in a high school psychology class and decide to become rat lab partners. Much hilarity ensues. Coincidentally (or kismetidentally?) they both are planning on going to IU and have a common friend, who is slightly manic and annoying, that is also supposedly attending IU. Said overly dramatic friend has also asked both psychology girls to room with her at IU, and both are somewhat terrified of that outcome. So, using their mastery of psychological manipulation they are able to formulate a plan in which they are roommates at IU and hysterical girl is let down gently. The chain of events set forth by this choice bit of kismet is as complex and long winded as the "begats" in the bible, but here goes anyway... (noisy throat clearing)

Carrie and Candice live happily at IU for four years and meet a multitude of characters, charlatans, and cads in their various endeavors, but here, in their last year together, we get some kismet...

 

Candice meets Misty and Carrie meets Heddy.

Misty knows Ollie and Seth.

Misty knows Jake.

Misty convinces Carrie to party with Seth and Ollie.

Carrie dislikes Seth.

Misty still likes Ollie.

Candice and Misty and Jake live together when poor Carrie goes to work for The Man.

Candice and Jake fall desperately in love.

Carrie and Misty takes several interesting trips together and become well versed in Mexican culture.

Seth and Ollie move to Colorado.

Seth and Ollie meet Heather.

Heather likes Ollie.

Ollie likes girls with beautiful faces and souls blacker than a coal miner's asshole.

Carrie and Misty decide to take a road trip to visit Seth and Ollie.

Carrie likes Seth.

Misty dislikes Ollie.

Carrie lives with Heddy and they have a ridiculous amount of fun.

Carrie and Seth fall in love long distance.

Carrie, Candice, Jake, and Misty live together, for way too brief a time.

Carrie moves to Colorado.

Heather and Carrie become instantaneous friends.

Ollie and Heather fall in love.

Candice and Jake get married.

Seth and Ollie know DJ.

DJ likes Misty.

Misty likes DJ.

Heddy moves to Colorado and lives briefly in Carrie's dining room and later in a real room.

Candice and Jake have Owen.

Misty moves to Colorado.

Misty and Carrie live together.

Carrie and Seth get married.

Heddy finishes grad school and becomes a successful therapist and overall badass.

Candice and Jake have Loba.

Misty and DJ have David.

Ollie and Heather get engaged.

I don't believe that all these fabulous connections were just happenstance. I truly believe that kismet was at work. The word kismet even sounds like the name of a little fairy who does good deeds. Everything that has happened to me in Colorado has not been 100% pleasant (car accidents, death, gingivitis) but looking back on all that has happened over the past 5 years, I sense that little Kismet has been sitting on my shoulder, smiling through the good and the bad, making things happen just as they should.